Tag Archives: God

“I Am Yours”

I needed this song today ….reminder that God is ever present.  He sent us this beautiful singer whose voice is purely graced with a gift.  Angels shine His love onto our darkness.


I see Your fingerprints
The work of Your hands
It’s all in Your hands
I see the evidence
Leaving nothing to chance
The world’s in Your hands

So I rest in Your promises
Now I am sure of this
I’m Yours

Let the waters rise
I will stand as the oceans roar
Let the earth shake beneath me
Let the mountains fall
You are God over the storm
And I am Yours

I hear the voice of love
Calling me home
To where I belong
It cripples every fear
And the ones who will kneel
Will walk away healed

So I rest in Your promises
Now I am sure of this
I’m Yours
No power is strong enough
To separate me from Your love
I’m Yours…

So let the waters rise
I will stand as the oceans roar
Let the earth shake beneath me
Let the mountains fall
You are God over the storm
And I am Yours

Even the thunder and the wind obey
At the command of my Father, Father
I set my feet upon Your mighty name
So let the rain fall harder, harder

So take my everything, my flesh and blood
I’ll lay me down on the altar, altar
I am forever covered in Your love
So let the rain fall hard

So let the waters rise
I will stand as the oceans roar
Let the earth shake beneath me
Let the mountains fall
You are God over the storm
And I am Yours

Let the waters rise
I will stand as the oceans roar
Let the earth shake beneath me
Let the mountains fall
You are God over the storm
And I am Yours

You are God over the storm
And I am Yours

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The Year of Betrayal

This year has brought to light many betrayals. My body has betrayed me. Some girlfriends double crossed me. Another friend disclosed some information in the hopes of exposing some little known facts about me. Some friends I want to believe unintentionally revealed little things. But the biggest betrayal was from a person I considered a best friend, the one who knew all my secrets, fears. I have never felt so disillusioned and vulnerable. Mind you, I have family members who are mentally ill and re-write history all of the time. So I am used to betrayal but not to this magnitude, not from the one person I considered sane, in control.

I go to Mass and want to light a candle for all that are lost. But then I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror – and I am the one that is lost. “It is not an enemy who taunts me – I could bear that. It is not my foes who so arrogantly insult me – I could have hidden from them. Instead, it is you – my equal, my companion and close friend. What good fellowship we once enjoyed as we walked together to the house of God.” – Psalm 55:12-15

Of all experiences in life, betrayal by a trusted friend is one of the most difficult to understand, accept, move on from. I find it difficult to breathe some times. My self-esteem was already at a low from my accident, losing my job, dealing with a new cancer, feeling dependent. Betrayals from friends only further produced feelings of worthlessness for having trusted an untrustworthy person. I feel like anger and depression are my only recourse. It raises questions about my judgment. Because of the intimate friend’s knowledge of my situation, such betrayal has great potential for further damage. And I am just not equipped right now, in this singular frame of mind to effectively deal with all of it.

I just quietly pray. Help me, Lord God, to let go of the hurts that have come my way. Amen.

Igniting my own true light out of this darkness.


Love is the opposite of logic….

Logic is argumentative, aggressive upon the mind, splits the world into right and wrong, us and them. Love is generative, compassionate, embracing all creation. Logic pays attention to what is being said. Love pays attention to how things are said. Logic leads to debate. Love leads to communion. Practice love to be closer to God.


We are all important….

…to someone….

Always remember you are unique and you are important. There is no one else in the world quite like you. You are special. There never has been and there never will be anyone like you again.

Don’t let people take away your respect for yourself. No matter what they say or do remember that you are very important and a worthwhile person, and always retain respect for yourself. They cannot take away your self respect and dignity, for you control what you think of yourself and no one else.

You have your own special qualities and talents, and though you may not have the talents and gifts that someone else has, you have your own talents and gifts that others do not have. No one else can be you. Only you can be you. Try to be the best you possible.

Remember also that you are important to other people. You cannot help but touch the lives of other people as you go through life. There are many people who need your love and support, and who look up to you, and want to emulate you. People you may not even be aware of need you, and watch your life, and if you give up and fail yourself, you are failing them and letting them down too.

And you are important in the eyes of God.

I believe God spared me since His plan for me is not completed.  I am still trying to figure out my role.   I know I was born to be somebody.  I know I am meant to be important to someone.  

Today has been yet another life affirming day…and a day where I must accept the truth about certain people in my life.  Some people grow, change, adapt…others just lie, and continually let you down and themselves.  

“Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too.”

“Never lie, steal, cheat, or drink. But if you must lie, lie in the arms of the one you love. If you must steal, steal away from bad company. If you must cheat, cheat death. And if you must drink, drink in the moments that take your breath away”  – Will Smith

I am just going to be me…be responsible and true to myself.  ♥

 

 

 


Striving with God’s help…♥

This is what I will strive for today of all days: Pray as if it’s up to God, work as if it’s up to you. No matter how bad things may look right now, it means nothing – it’s how good they can be with God’s help that counts. In life you can absolutely count on one thing – everything can turn around in one day, in one minute sometimes. Don’t you dare to give up – you might be a moment away from a windfall.


What hurts you today, makes you stronger tomorrow…

Rough week!  So over the moon its Friday…but the weekend is already mocking me with silence.  Took my Chili dog to the vet, learned he had arthritis and a spinal injury deterioration – he is limping around a little better with his new meds.  Poor little guy – he has already endured two knee surgeries.  I had to go to the Orthopedic today to learn my results from my MRI – sure enough I need surgery on my right hand – they found a tear in my ligament, a cyst, and central perforation…enough said.  Was praying against hope that surgery would not be needed.  But learning that somehow this is my life…

I find myself repeatedly asking God how much am I to take and when will it be my year but I somehow find the strength He provides for me to keep moving forward…smiling through my tears.   I was hoping to find someone special by now so I can find comfort and support in another but I guess it’s just not my time.  I know my Mr. Perfect for me is out there.  And I know that God has a plan as to why my life, physically and emotionally needs to go through this pain now with broken bones that don’t heal.

I am learning that letting go has nothing to do with weakness, and everything to do with strength.  We let go and walk away not because we want others to realize our worth, but because we finally realize our own worth.

Sometimes you just need to do your best and surrender the rest. – Don’t be too hard on yourself.  There are plenty of people willing to do that for you.  Tell yourself, “I am doing the best I can with what I have in this moment.  And that is all I can expect of anyone, including me.”  Love yourself and be proud of everything that you do, even your mistakes.  Because even mistakes mean you’re trying.

You are in control of one person, and one person only: yourself. – There is only one way to be happy, only one route to happiness, and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of your control.  Letting go in your relationships doesn’t always mean that you don’t care about people anymore; it’s simply realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.

What’s right for you may be wrong for others, and vice versa.– Think for yourself, and allow others the privilege of doing so too.  We all dance to the beat of a different drum.  There are few absolute ‘rights’ and ‘wrongs’ in the world.  You need to live your life your way – the way that’s right for you.

Some people will refuse to accept you for who you are.   And I am learning not to care as much.   Always choose to be true to yourself, even at the risk of incurring ridicule from others, rather than being fake and incurring the pain and confusion of trying to be someone you’re not.  When you are comfortable in your skin, not everyone in this world will like you, and that’s okay.  Yup…it really is.

Relationships can only exist on a steady foundation of truth.  When there is a breakdown in a relationship, you must have the hard conversation.  It may not be pretty and it may not feel good.  But if you are willing to listen and tell the truth, it will open up.  When you learn how to build relationships based on truth and authenticity, rather than masks, false perfection, and being phony, your relationships will heal, connect, and thrive.

Sometimes walking away is the only way to win.  Never waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who have proven that they are committed to misunderstanding you.  In other words, don’t define your intelligence by the number of arguments you have won, but by the number of times you have said, “This unnecessary nonsense is not worth my time.”

Sitting in silence I will learn to hide my pain…

Focusing on what I have left, not only on what I have lost.

It truly should never be all about what you have lost, but about what you have learned.

Still looking forward on putting my loss behind me….looking forward to my newest finds….

I have said this before…

Every day I am crumbling more apart and yet falling more together all at the same time.

We all need to remember one simple thing: it’s OK to be lost. It’s OK to let go of needing all the answers. It’s not going to kill you— in fact, it just might bring you to life.

I’ve lived, I’ve loved, I’ve lost, I’ve missed, I’ve hurt, I’ve trusted, I’ve made mistakes, but most of all, I’ve learned.   Very happy that I am in one piece…mind, heart, body and spirit…. All good to go….♥


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