Category Archives: Thank you

The Art of Saying Thank You

I would have to say one of my biggest pet peeves is when people don’t say thank you. What has happened to good manners. etiquette, gratitude, appreciation?

I know society has changed in many ways:  I understand how the world moves at a faster pace – and so many of us have adapted to this pace and prefer things be done more quickly, by email or phone.  I believe that some people have so much that so many take it all for granted.  Some people just have a sense of entitlement, and they feel like they deserve it.

Acknowledging takes very little effort but people still don’t make the time. I am tired. Tired of all the selfish people, especially in the family I was sadly born into.  I give, and give with very little respect.  I have to stop.  I always feel worse after holidays.  They under appreciate, and I over give.  No more.

For years, they take and rarely express gratitude – they just continue to show me they don’t care, they demean me, and show by their silence and lack of acknowledging my giving how much they belittle me and I guess they don’t have to thank me because I mean nothing to them.

They never recognize that I had a choice, I didn’t have to buy anything, all their favorites. They were not entitled.  I didn’t have to make the time, to pick up anything.  I am just a giver.  I am respectful.  No more.

I have to write this over and over, so I can make myself accountable.  Some people truly don’t deserve me in their life – in no form.

Keeping more to myself.  Learning to respect and appreciate myself more.  Give to myself more …  with grace in my step and hope in my heart.

Advertisements

Reflections of a Year

Happy Holidays, Everyone!  I hope you have all been enjoying the holiday season and its many celebrations.   I have been blessed with love, warmth, meals, and friends, and yes – some truly wonderful gifts…♥

The past year for me has been a journey of discovery and re-direction in many ways.  It has been a time of quiet reflection, a time to gather my memories of my pasts, and learn how to accept love into my life again.  Aside from some grief and feeling of loss it has brought serious contemplation of the importance of friends, family, the necessity of unassailable caring for one another and the need to resolve differences and reach a level of unimpeachable understanding between us all.   And it hasn’t and still isn’t always easy to accomplish.   I have been fortunate though – so many times this past year, I have felt at peace, sense of quiet faith that all will be well in the future.

These last few days of the year will be all abuzz with chatter of the past year’s best of, hottest this, latest that.  And even more than that, everybody will most likely vow a commitment to some act of self-improvement for the upcoming year.   Ah – the infamous New Year’s Resolution.   Good intentions, that most often fall by the wayside only to be regarded as lists of would’ve, could’ve, should’ve.

Want to know why I don’t believe in New Year’s Resolutions?!   I have said this many times – they are an excuse to take the bad parts of your life and flaunt them with the promise that you’ll change them; they’re an excuse to realize you have messed up and are going to change without being ashamed.  But there is no shame in wanting to change.  We are constantly changing, whether we know it or not.  Take a year and live it one day at a time; you’d be surprised how much can change on its own when you’re not making dreamy long-term goals.  That is how I have lived my life…and now here I am and I don’t know how to accept people who don’t.

At this time of year, we naturally think back over the past twelve months and look ahead towards the future.  Looking back at times gone by (Auld Lang Syne) can be a good thing, especially if we focus on the stuff we’ve accomplished and the adventures we’ve had with friends or family. I think reflecting on our accomplishments and giving thanks for our good fortune is healthy.  But what about looking forward?

So I wonder how many of us will make New Year’s resolutions:  Lose weight.  Sleep enough hours.  Hit the gym.  Cut out the fast food.  Quit smoking.  Drink less.

If you’re looking for a new way to approach your outlook on the New Year, try this instead. Take a moment for some silent self-reflection on the past year and use where you are today to get where you want to be tomorrow.  While I’m not one for New Year’s Resolutions, I am committed to setting goals.

This coming January, concludes my first year writing this blog.  What a journey it has been.  I want to thank all of my followers for taking time out to read some of my musings.  This has been a very disparate year for me – looking for love, fighting demons of insecurities, loss, dealing with cancer, re-connecting with family and friends, looking for work, joining support group, volunteer work…the year is ending on  a very positive note for me…finding a great man and steady work have been true blessings.

How about you?  Are you setting resolutions goals for the new calendar year?


A Thanksgiving Message

As we celebrate Thanksgiving, let’s remember that the holiday’s name is a compound word – Thanks and Giving.   Let’s all try to find and carry out  new ways for enhancing the celebration of Thanksgiving and the entire holiday season ahead.

Despite obvious challenges, each of us has something to be thankful for – our lives, families, friendships, and work. While there is no perfection in life, I hope you consider the glass more than half full for most of us most of the time. Thanking those whom we love, admire, depend upon, and have positive relationships with is an important, but too infrequently practiced an activity.  Let’s try and practice saying, “Thank You” more than a few times in the next few weeks.   “God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say “thank you?” (William A. Ward).

Here are some Thanks-Giving Thoughts – practice, share them…

Share with those with less fortunate than you.  Consider the gift of one week’s grocery bill donated to a community food bank, domestic violence or homeless shelter, foster parent or elder services association as a gesture of appreciation for what we have, and what others do for the less fortunate.

Express your gratitude in word and deed to those who care for others as a profession or as volunteers. Compliment the good works of caregivers for our children and frail elders. Those caring individuals who clean the bottoms of babies and the bed-ridden, and help nurture and stimulate their minds, deserve the kindnesses of family members and neighbors all though the year, but especially at holiday time.

Give time to a worthy cause. Our volunteer time builds community and creates a great example for our youth.   Whether we choose to sing in a choir, read to a child, blind person, mentor a youth, collect coats for the homeless, or visit a lonely elder, our time is a priceless gift which appreciates in value.

Conserve energy resources by consuming less fuel, reusing, and recycling.  Our throw away culture is feeding our landfills with trash, and our air and water absorb the residue of pollutants. Preserving our environment is self-preservation, as well as a life-saving gift to wildlife, plant-life, and our children’s children.

Slow down.   Stop and smell the roses!  Whether behind the steering wheel or in conversation with others, speed is not a good thing.  Being in a perpetual hurry endangers our lives on the road, and cuts short our relationships with others. Give yourself a few extra minutes in transit to be a safe driver especially during the holidays and wintry weather…and listen a bit longer to the words in conversation with loved ones and co-workers.  Actively listen and show others that positive attention is a gift worth giving.

Put technology in its place. We live in a high-tech, low-touch culture, governed by the beeps, buzzes, and blinking lights of technology. As time is compressed, stress grows.  Immediate response raises expectations, reduces careful consideration, and makes us more prone to error. Take a breather from all the technology, and ask others to be considerate in public and private spaces by turning the “on” switch “off.”  We all need to rediscover that eye contact and voices are great ways to show we are focusing our attention on those who seek it.  Cell phone, e-mail should not keep our loved ones on hold.

Advocate with assertion, not aggression. Free speech is not an invitation to be offensive.  Responsible advocacy requires thoughtful purpose, practical solutions, and open conversation. Clear and consistent communication with allies and adversaries alike sets the stage for progress.  Let’s all try to express ourselves in a heart-felt way with composure and grace.

Health is a form of wealth.   So many people sadly take it for granted.  Making sure we eat right, exercise, and take time to rest and relax are the keys to clear thinking and long-term effectiveness.  Our bodies cannot support us unless our minds resolve to take care and be careful.  And if we are not healthy, we can’t care of others.

Take optimism pills every morning….the time-release kind!  🙂  Negativity is contagious. Those who believe they will make a difference can achieve their goals.  Pessimism is the mind’s way of giving up before the first step is taken. Those who want to make a change for the better in their lives, neighborhood, and the world around them, should stop whining and start winning –  and if you want a glass of wine afterwards, that is acceptable!  🙂

As we plan for the holiday season, we should recognize that there are neighbors, young and elder, whose weeks ahead are not brimming with joy. For whatever reason, in whatever circumstance, we well know that there are people in need who can be helped if we choose to do so.

To honor and remember a family member or neighbor who was there for you when you needed them most, please thank those who illuminate our paths, exemplify kindness, teach justice, and nurture our futures – what a fitting tribute to the legacy of our ancestors and what a positive example for our future.

Try to remember and focus – your work, the gifts you share, and the example you set is an inspiration to one or many….♥


%d bloggers like this: