Category Archives: language

Saturdays filled with romance…♥

Who doesn’t want their Saturday nights filled with love, romance and passion. I love words…words move me. Love letters make me feel, awaken and arouse feelings…sincere love letters are made of insight, understanding, and compassion. A real love letter can produce a transformation in each person…the writer and the reader…♥

“The letter had been crumpled up and tossed onto the grate. It had burned all around the edges, so the names at the top and bottom had gone up in smoke. But there was enough of the bold black scrawl to reveal that it had indeed been a love letter. And as Hannah read the singed and half-destroyed parchment, she was forced to turn away to hide the trembling of her hand.

—should warn you that this letter will not be eloquent. However, it will be sincere, especially in light of the fact that you will never read it. I have felt these words like a weight in my chest, until I find myself amazed that a heart can go on beating under such a burden.

I love you. I love you desperately, violently, tenderly, completely. I want you in ways that I know you would find shocking. My love, you don’t belong with a man like me. In the past I’ve done things you wouldn’t approve of, and I’ve done them ten times over. I have led a life of immoderate sin. As it turns out, I’m just as immoderate in love. Worse, in fact.

I want to kiss every soft place of you, make you blush and faint, pleasure you until you weep, and dry every tear with my lips. If you only knew how I crave the taste of you. I want to take you in my hands and mouth and feast on you. I want to drink wine and honey from you.

I want you under me. On your back.

I’m sorry. You deserve more respect than that. But I can’t stop thinking of it. Your arms and legs around me. Your mouth, open for my kisses. I need too much of you. A lifetime of nights spent between your thighs wouldn’t be enough.

I want to talk with you forever. I remember every word you’ve ever said to me.

If only I could visit you as a foreigner goes into a new country, learn the language of you, wander past all borders into every private and secret place, I would stay forever. I would become a citizen of you.

You would say it’s too soon to feel this way. You would ask how I could be so certain. But some things can’t be measured by time. Ask me an hour from now. Ask me a month from now. A year, ten years, a lifetime. The way I love you will outlast every calendar, clock, and every toll of every bell that will ever be cast. If only you—

And there it stopped.” ― Lisa Kleypas, A Wallflower Christmas

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In my solitude…

As in every summer the past few years, I try to date. I have to admit, this summer, I have not been filled with my usual joie de vivre. Usually when winter comes around, I hibernate; and enjoy my solitude. Sometimes, all I want is a partner, other times, most times I am relieved to be alone in my solitude. I honestly can’t wait until winter…and the ringing in of the new year. Thank goodness its only 142 days away from 2014…2013 has not been a good year, I am still in pain from accident, exhausted, unpleasant, very close to coming unhinged.

If you ask me, there’s a moment in everyone’s life when you feel helpless, are just helpless. Trust me I know. I have been lost before…barely hanging on…with hope, faith and trust. And then something happens, something too big to understand,and then everything changes forever.

I have all these feelings – these weird, unsettling feelings, and I have had this burning desire to express them. But I can’t fully. I just can’t. I try. But somehow I feel like I speak this language and can’t make myself understood. And all these feelings I have – they are trapped and they are stuck in my heart…And I just feel so lonely.

Do you know why people hate to admit they are lonely? It’s because when you do, everyone thinks that something is wrong with you. They think “I have people in my life, why don’t you?” But the strange thing is, you can have people in your life and still be alone. I sometimes find myself in a crowd of people, but no one can hear me or understand me. So I rather be alone….in my solitude.

Sometimes people do actually feel that way. Sometimes your life feels like it’s caving in on you. Sometimes people really do feel like they don’t want to exist, like they want to just curl up in a ball, and go into that place between life and death. Saying “I don’t want to exist” isn’t saying “I want to go die”. It’s saying “I wish that, for the time being, I could go somewhere and not have to feel”. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. And if you don’t know how it feels to feel this way, then you have no place to judge anyone who does.

I am telling you, there’s nothing wrong with being lonely sometimes, it’s okay…I know I will be alright…just not today…


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