Today is a strange day indeed. I have received texts from people that I barely hear from … fair weather friends. I don’t have many real friends – and I am okay with this. I responded to each text with a more personal note and they kept it short. It figures. People ask how are you, but they don’t really care, do they?! Understanding other people’s motives is nearly impossible now, for they only offer me specific parts of the big picture. Although useful information may be lurking beneath the surface, I am just not interested in spending my precious time peeling layers of the onion just to get to the core. Instead of looking for answers I don’t have yet, just trying to get through the day and work with what I already know. Trusting my intuition. Finally!! Staying away from other people’s drama. I try really hard not to hold grudges. But I do remember facts …even with my chemo brain. Trying to remember that just because I miss someone, moments we shared, doesn’t mean I need them back in my life. Sometimes missing is just a part of moving on … with grace in my step and hope in my heart.
Category Archives: Fake
The worst kinds of enemies are those who pretend to be your friends…yes, sadly true…and all around me.
I have no real need nor time for people who come to me when they need me, then throw me aside when they are fine.
Learned the hard way that fake friends are like your shadow, they follow you in the sun, but leave your side when it gets dark.
My accident this past January has really opened my eyes as to who my real friends are in my personal as well as my work life.
It’s really hard to trust people these days. I find myself always looking over my shoulder these days, waiting for the back stabbing knife in my back. We must be so careful who we share our weaknesses with. Learning that some people can’t wait for the opportunity to use them against us.
False friends, frenemies, are people who pretend to be a friend and then turn out to be just the opposite. Yup!! There are some people who get close to you for the specific reason to make fun of you behind your back, delight in the misery you endure, use you for whatever you can give them, and find out about your life so they can gossip about it later. Sad…especially when we are no longer in high school.
Because we generally want to see the best in people, we may give false friends several chances to prove that they are more than an enemy in disguise. However, when you discover a false friend in your life, you should distance yourself from them. Life is too short to be surrounded with people who don’t really care about you. So negativity be gone. I have cut people out of my life…who have proven they are no longer a true friend.
There are different types of friends – so called friends:
– The Opportunist: Use and abuse, and never return a favor.
– Egocentric, self centered: Always talking about themselves, brags a lot.
– The woe is me friend: only seek you out for therapy, and tend to hold grudges.
– The true fake friend: Smiles in your face, talks behind your back.
– Snobby friends – lack mutual respect.
– Spy friend or interloper: uses, interferes, intervenes, climbing on you – these are the jealous ones, they take ownership of your ideas, efforts, etc. Watch out for the blackmail. sigh
– Ignores: They meet someone, start a new romance and all of a sudden, they don’t return calls, break plans, etc.
All of these “friends” are missing out on a very important part of their emotional life. In the long run, they are ones that will lack the balance and support that friendship can give. And us poor gentle souls are better off without them. These fair weather friends only want to come around when they need your sun to shine on their dark and gloomy days. I know I have enough sunshine but I no longer need the shadows.
And because I have a big heart, have been accused of being naive and gullible…I tend to give people many chances. But knowing when to leave a friendship is more crucial to me these days. Choosing to let friends go is never an easy thing. If your friend has consistently shown you that they will leave you high and dry, it may be time to walk away. Sometimes we give people the benefit of the doubt and immediately think of them as our friend, when they perhaps don’t feel the same way. Maybe they are using you, or maybe they just don’t know how to be a friend. Either way, wish them the best and mean it, and then return to the people in your life who do treat you well….I am….♥
#ThingsThatAnnoyMe: Why try and be fake when being real takes less effort? #HateFake
One thing I’ve learned about myself is that I have a very low- to-no tolerance for bullshit and insincere people.
With people, I can’t stand facades. People tend to put up fronts because they want to be perceived a certain way, they want you to think highly of them, respect them, and maybe even admire them. Sometimes they build up facades because they’re just scared of being judged or hurt by you. They built up these fronts to represent themselves because deep down, they are flawed individuals in one way or another.
The thing is, I like people a lot more when they acknowledge their flaws, rather than hiding them. For me, when people open up to me, it’s wonderful. The friendships I have where people are perfectly candid and show me their true selves, exposing their feelings regardless of how vulnerable that makes them, are the friendships I value most. I appreciate genuine sincerity in people. If you can acknowledge that flawed part of yourself you don’t like, it demonstrates a certain strength of character that is not evident when you mask yourself. It makes you more human to me, and helps me accept your flaws.
People are more beautiful when you accept them for what they really are. Flaws make us human, and struggling to overcome those flaws make us even more so. But one crucial step to growing as a person is to not lie to yourself. Sharing who you are without reservation with another person is as intimate as you can get, in my opinion.
I used to feel sorry for some people who felt the need to pretend. Now seriously – step away. So you posers out there who manipulate, try to say what you think others want to hear, please stay away from me.
I rather spend time with children who are sweetly oblivious and not caring how others perceive them. They usually smile and think all is great – until some mean spirited person brings their flaws to their attention.
A child has no ego, no past or future. The child has no attachments, and because of this, they are able to express themselves fully, without any prejudices or preconceived ideas. Ah the innocent, young and truly beautiful souls that exist should have no real enemies but time.
I despise the true hypocrite – the one who ceases to preceive his deception, the one who lies with sincerity.
Actions will always speak louder than words – and actions will always hurt more and lie louder than words.
In the words of Abraham Lincoln: You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can not fool all of the people all of the time. Fake people should remember these wise words!