Monthly Archives: February 2013

Ding!! You’ve Got Mail…♥ notes…

Wow!  What a week…and it’s only Tuesday!  Yesterday flowers…today chocolates…then I get the best gift of all a love note…via email.

What a long but “sweet filled” day….only to get home to the beautiful sound, “You’ve Got Mail”…as much as I have enjoyed receiving my gifts lately – flowers, chocolates…the best one received is the most valuable present and it lasts a lifetime….I find it extremely romantic to receive a love note via email, card, letter.  This special man is putting the past men in my life to shame.   And I am enjoying every single second.

Long overdue….

I have been very fortunate to receive and write plenty of emotional letters. Not only from lovers but also from my brother, and even friends.  I have a box with all my letters…I like to re-read them.  Reading my letters reminds me of times of happiness, sadness, joy, and important events in my life. Reading a letter is like seeing yourself through the eyes of others.   Modern technologies are great for keeping in touch with people, but they can be so detached, especially text messages with its many acronyms, short cuts, and lack of tone….but a love note…if written with care, can make me swoon, melt…

With a few strokes of the keyboard, and weeks of emailing, one day — you can wake up falling in love with the other person!    Written words can be powerful.  I am always saying that actions speak louder than words…and taking the time to write a love note is an action that can hold this incredible power of sharing adoring, endearing and affectionate words…ah –  love letters.  If we lived in a different era, these words would have been shared entirely in handwritten letters.   Today our correspondence, in this age of AOL, GMail, Google+, email rules.  I am going to consider these email messages  as “love letters” because they are no less romantic, thoughtful than letters sent by regular snail mail, stamped postage.

How many of you have seen the movie, “Moonlight Mile”?  Or, “The Love Letter”?  Or “Nights in Rodanthe”?  Any Nicholas Sparks movie / book!   How about the movie, “Sex and the City” where Carrie guesses the password finally and finds that Big has re-written numerous love letters by poets, and one from himself promising to love her forever??  Swoon…♥

Have you ever received a love note from someone you adored? Didn’t it just make you feel amazingly special? Receiving a love letter brings a rush; opening love letters opens the heart; reading love letters awakens our spirit.  Sometimes they can be bittersweet.  But such a huge compliment.

Love notes tell us we are someone who is seen, longed for and adored. Love letters tell us we are someone who is worth being romanced. How can the heart not spill over with the joy of being known, recognized and pursued? It’s what our feminine heart really longs for, isn’t it?

They hold a special power to transform us, to lift our mood.  Changes me from an ordinary person to a woman who is special to someone. Wow!  Me? Worthy of being pursued? Wanted!? Desired!? Beautiful!?   Yay!  I am going to read and re-read each email several times to let this new image of  me sink in.  Pure bliss…magical…words transform!   Through the words of each love note I came to know myself as a woman who is adored, desired, worthy, loved and longed for….So in a very poetic and mysterious way, flesh became word via passionate typing.   Who knew?!  ♥

Words from “The Love Letter” –

Text of the letter: Dearest, Do you know how much in love with you I am? Did I trip? Did I stumble – lose my balance, graze my knee, graze my heart? I know I’m in love when I see you. I know when I long to see you, I’m on fire. Not a muscle has moved. Leaves hang unruffled by any breeze. The air is still. I have fallen in love without taking a step. You are all wrong for me and I know it, but I can no longer care for my thoughts unless they are thoughts of you. When I am close to you, I feel your hair brush my cheek when it does not. I look away from you sometimes, then I look back. When I tie my shoes, when I peel an orange, when I drive my car, when I lie down each night without you, I remain,
Text of the letter: Yours

Famous Love Letters: Ludwig von Beethoven:

ever thine

ever mine

ever ours…

Ah…romance…viva amor…♥


Life, Love…no room for lies…

Someone once asked me how I hold my head up so high after all that I have been through….its because I am a survivor, not a victim.

Life is filled with so many emotions…happiness, sadness, love, hate, tears, laughter, and many more.   When life challenges you, hold your head up high and have faith that all in life will work out and God will always be by your side.

Never forget that there are three types of people who can make a difference in your life:

  1. Those who helped you through difficult times.
  2. Those who left you during those difficult times.
  3. Those who put you through those difficult times.

Learning to balance all in my life…

Learning how to give, but not allow myself to be used.

Learning how to truly love, but not allow my heart to be abused.

Learning how to trust, but don’t be so naive.

Learning how to fully listen to others, but not lose my own voice.

Still holding onto the hope that some day everything will all make perfect sense.  For now, I continue to laugh at the confusion, smile though the tears, and keep reminding myself that everything really does happen for a reason!

Living life to the fullest teaches us to make good use of time.  Being conscious of time can really teach us the value of life.

One lie is all it takes for someone to lose their faith in you.  The best thing you can do is always be upfront, always be real and always tell the truth.

To be honest, I am always a little disappointed when a real liar’s pants don’t actually catch on fire.  Love this commercial…finding laughter in all is key!

Pants on Fire – Progressive Commercial

There are four very important words in life that everyone should learn, embrace and live by:  Love, honesty, truth and respect!  Without these in your life, we truly have nothing.  ♥


Hope is beautiful…

Heard today….”Tragedy makes you even more beautiful”…taken aback at first, I found myself speechless…yes me speechless…Beauty is definitely in the eyes of the beholder…”Beauty in things exists merely in the mind which contemplates them.”

I am an emotional mess these days.  I feel ugly – inside and outside.  It’s been a month since my accident and I am so tired of the pain I feel each second of every minute of every day.  I am tired of trying to learn how to do the simplest of things with my left hand.  I understand there are a few good people who are truly in my corner praying for me and hoping that the scars within me are not as visible on the outside nor on the inside.  I am afraid to see people because then they will see that I am barely clinging to life by a shredding thread….of hope.

So many people unfortunately see beauty as something to be measured and weighed.

I no longer see beauty that way. I see beauty as the grace point between what hurts and what heals, between the shadow of tragedy and the light of joy. I find beauty in my scars.

We all have scars, inside and out. We have freckles from sun exposure, emotional trigger points, broken bones, and broken hearts.  The invisible scars are the hardest to let go and deal with.

However our scars manifest, we need not feel ashamed but beautiful.

It is beautiful to have lived, really lived, and to have the marks to prove it. It’s not a competition—as in “My scar is better than your scar”—but it’s a testament of our inner strength.  I am strong.  I know this…I just have to keep reminding myself.

“The tragedy in a man’s life is what dies inside of him while he lives.” – Thoreau.  I am tired of dying a little at a time.  I don’t want to hide, to run away, to stay away…I will always somehow manage to smile through my tears…it’s just that some days are truly harder than others.

The Dalai Lama, the Tibetan saying:  “Tragedy should be utilized as a source of strength.  No matter what sort of difficulties, how painful experience is, if we lose our hope, that’s our real disaster.”  I believe, I continue to hope…for better days.

…smiling through my tears…♥


Sleepless nights, restless days…ramblings…

You can either choose to FEEL your life, DIE a slow death…or STOP, breathe slowly….FEEL and LET GO…I chose…I did.

Life continues to prove to me that in order to fully find yourself…we  sometimes need to lose our way.  I still can’t believe that two months ago I was talking marriage to a man who was so wrong for me for the long term and only a month ago, I was thinking of quitting my job, moving, etc.   Today – this moment –  I am in such a different place.

I have been home bound for more than three weeks because of my accident.  And now with this winter storm, I am even more tired, going mad from cabin fever.  I feel like screaming.

Really being stuck – literally – shows us who are friends are, and who are fair weather friends are.

Thank goodness for real friends, caring people, thoughtful people…just when I want to give up, they throw me a lifeline.

I’m going to smile like nothing is wrong, talk like everything is perfect, act like it’s all a dream, and pretend like it’s not hurting me.  The pain I feel now is more tangible due to my broken bones, not my broken spirit.
Acting…

Oh well, it’s another year. Last year was a year of hopes, dreams, looking for love, looking for work, triumphs, hours on the phone with Cablevision, but I survived yet another cancer scare, Hockey lockout, American Airlines pilot near strike, AMR’s Chapter 11 bankruptcy filing, losing keys, two pairs of glasses…. But everything is possible at any age.

I will continue to live my funny life….safety challenged and all…♥

Live through this, and you won’t look back…

 


We…

We fear rejection…

We want attention…

We crave affection…

We dream of perfection…

 


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