A daring, baring sleepless soul.

I imagine conversations….words we should have spoken…unspoken words keep me awake.  Words kept in the head are like voices underwater.  They are distorted.

Insomnia…sleep eludes me…

The things about life that I’ve learned is that you’re going to get hurt. You’re going to have emotional nights and cry yourself to sleep for hours. You’re going to suffer some kind of heartbreak, some kind of loss. But you will also have those moments where you heal. Those moments are the best. You feel like you smile for the first time again. You feel like you’re alive again. Life just kinda restarts.

Smile, laugh, forgive, believe, and love, all over again.

The moon will illuminate my room soon and I will be consumed with more doom…see need sleep – beginning to rhyme.

Never growing up.

Never going to sleep.

Its taken me the last ten years to fully understand that home is a person…and I lost that home, perished one sunny morning.  It’s no wonder I have been roaming for so long.

Dear Tummy, sorry for all the butterflies. Dear Pillow, sorry for all the tears. Dear Heart, sorry for the damage. Dear Brain, you were right.

I may sometimes feel alone when I am lying in bed, or cry myself to a fitful sleep…but in my awake dreams I hold onto the thoughts that linger constantly on the edges of sleep – that my heart belongs to someone taken from me too soon and to someone I have yet to meet…and sometimes I don’t feel so alone in bed and many times I feel loved.  ♥

I wonder if anyone thinks of me as they fall asleep…

I am not afraid of the dark…I am scared to be alone with my thoughts and what the darkness brings…


About Teresita

I am a writer, a thinker, an introvert, work behind the scenes kind of person - I am of Puerto Rican blood, have an Italian soul, and a Berliner mind....just learning...♥ View all posts by Teresita

3 responses to “A daring, baring sleepless soul.

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