Beverley Mitchell – Angel

Play Song
“Angel”

Have you ever met an angel
Whose smile is like the sun
Whose laugh is like a melody
That reaches everyone

Have you ever hugged an angel
Swept up in their embrace
And swear there’s nothing in this world
That makes you feel that safe

[Chorus:]
Have you ever really loved an angel
Once you have you’ll never be the same again
Have you ever had to let go of an angel
Say goodbye, let ‘em fly, my angel, my best friend

Have you felt the strength of an angel
When you needed it the most
Lifted by those gentle wings
You know you’re not alone
Every now and then I feel the peace inside
Wherever life may take me, I’m guided by that light

[Chorus:]
Have you ever really loved an angel
Once you have you’ll never be the same again
Have you ever had to let go of an angel
Say goodbye, let ‘em fly, my angel, my best friend

Cause I have really loved an angel
How could I ever be the same
Cause I have had to let go of my angel
Say goodbye, let ‘em fly, my angel, my best friend…♥


Dani and Lizzy – Dancing in the Sky

Friend sent this to me…with two new Angels in Heaven this week, sometimes, words fail to express what our heart so desperately wants to say. We feel in such a way; the fire that burns inside our chests is threatening to shatter the world. We are powerful, yet we feel weak, because we want to be able to contain what we are feeling within punctuation marks. We must accept with grace and allow God to lead us. I believe there are openings in Heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy. ♥ RIP ♥ German Hernandez ♥ Edwin Cruz


Heaven has another angel…

Came across this poem below and really needed it today. We lost yet another family member, my first cousin, Germancito, after a very long battle with Cancer. He put up a good fight, but God has decided to relieve him of his pain and suffering. It was time for German to join God as one of his angels in heaven. My heart breaks for my aunt, Rosa, his siblings and for his 2 beautiful children. I pray that God gives my family the strength to deal with this immense loss. This was a man that I admired, he was, and always will be such an inspiration to me, his strength was incredible. Rest in peace. Life is so fragile. I wish more people, especially in my immediate family, could see and appreciate how short life truly is and take time to care about others, show more compassion. I feel at times, I care too much, I hurt too deep, but my heart is ever expanding and always forgiving. The sun shines yet again as God took another angel into heaven.

The loss of a love one is so hard to face,
you just want to hide,
go somewhere and escape!
But death is something,
we all must go through,
I know it’s hard,
when it’s someone you loved and knew.

Just know now,
he is in a better place,
no more hurt or pain shall he face.
It seems unfair and yes this is true,
but he is in Heaven now
watching over me and you!

God has called him home to rest!!
And he’s being well taken care of
Because God knows best!

“Only people who are capable of loving strongly can also suffer great sorrow, but this same necessity of loving serves to counteract their grief and heals them.” ― Leo Tolstoy


Sympathy, empathy…Grieving…

Another sad day as the sun shines bright bringing another angel to Heaven. My second cousin, who died June 11, 2013, left a hole in our family; but now he is being joined by his only son, his namesake – who died a hero at the age of 24, trying to save a friend. Both young men drowned this weekend. My heart is broken and aches for my cousin’s wife, the mother of this selfless young man.

This death marks the second for me in less than two weeks. But this one hits me so much harder. My feelings are a mix of sympathy, empathy, selfishness, grief, guilt, confusion…so many jumbled feelings.

When my cousin died last June, I was so afraid to see him in the casket. My cousin looked so much like my brother growing up. My brother passed away when he was only 25 years old, twenty years ago; but there isn’t a day that I don’t think about him, miss him. I think I was filled with so many anxious feelings of having to relive the moment of seeing my brother in the casket again. And now thinking of how my cousin’s son died…due to drowning and he was only 24 – almost exactly like my brother. It’s surreal. I feel like my heart is being ripped open again, emotions so raw, jumbled. Feeling like I did 20 years ago.

I know I can’t fully understand how my cousin-in-law feels – losing her husband, now losing her only son. I am sympathetic. I worry how she will survive, and find a way to move forward. Although, I feel sorry for her loss, I am also feeling strong pangs of empathy, and reliving my own personal loss from many years ago. It may be impossible to be fully empathetic because each individual’s reactions, thoughts and feelings to tragedy are unique. But I am not just feeling sorry for, I am sorry with and have placed myself in the midst of someone else’s emotional reactions.

Learning that grief takes on many forms, and never goes away fully.

“You don’t get over it, you just get through it. You don’t get by it, because you can’t get around it. It doesn’t ‘get better’; it just gets different. Everyday… Grief puts on a new face.” – (Wendy Feireisen)

“Learn to get in touch with silence within yourself, and know that everything in this life has purpose. There are no mistakes, no coincidences, all events are blessings given to us to learn from.” – (Elizabeth Kubler-Ross) ♥


Forgiveness…

Came across this on Facebook and it resonated…had to share:

Forgiveness doesn’t excuse their behavior. Forgiveness prevents their behavior from destroying your heart. ~ Author Unknown

Truth be told, when wronged, so many of us want to hurt those who hurt us. If you really think about it though, what is the point? If someone is unapologetic about their behavior, our attempts to “teach them a lesson” and/or seek revenge is not going to be effective; firstly because they will not see what we interpret as the error of their ways – they will simply continue to believe that they are right, and secondly because the longer we harbor negative feelings towards anyone or anything, the longer it eats US away from the inside. Essentially, we continue to destroy ourselves while the person who hurt us just carries on with their lives.

No, forgiveness does not excuse the behavior of others but it does allow us to move on without allowing their poison to control our thoughts and emotions. ~ Gia

Forgivenss

Forgivenss

I am all about forgiveness and moving forward. I have written many times, that I imagine people dead, so I forgive them; more for myself. I don’t live my life with regrets. I don’t think anyone owes me anything. I am solely responsible for my feelings, actions and reactions. I believe grudges are for those who insist that they are owed something; forgiveness, however, is for those who are strong enough to move on.


Life is fragile…RIP Rodney ♥

Today I received another sad reminder of how short life truly is. Lost another friend today, on this cold, rainy April day. So deeply saddened to hear of my friend, my classmate, my fellow Piscean – Rodney’s passing, for his family’s loss.

My heart is heavy and I am compelled to write, to attempt to unleash some of my feelings, my sadness. But words somehow also seem so hard and inadequate to express the sadness I am feeling. Rodney’s sudden and unexpected death is a painful reminder of how fragile and short life truly is. Try to live in the moment. I have dealt with too much death, passing of loved ones. And it doesn’t get easier; if anything it gets harder. Constant reminders of how mortal we are. Any time there is a tragedy, a sudden unexpected death I am once again reminded that life is so fragile. It also reminds me to focus on the present, to let the hurts and disappointments of the past slip away, and let go of the concerns and fears of the future. Life is way too precious to hold onto regrets, bitterness. Plans, our upcoming June school reunion, now just seem so trivial by comparison. Need to re-evaluate my personal priorities. What becomes more precious is the time spent with loved ones. My friend’s passing is yet another wake-up call to take care of ourselves, emotionally and physically. We need to treasure every moment, take notice of the value of time…time waits for no one.

Rodney’s sudden and unexpected death is a painful reminder of the extreme fragility of life. Rodney was such a strong, vibrant person. I will miss his daily Facebook uplifting quotes and funny posts. As I sit here, staring at the words as I type, attempting to make sense of this profound sadness I am feeling, it grows darker outside the window. Words and sentences, like me, have difficulty breathing in this space. One of the most important things any of us can do now is to try to find some meaning in tragedy, and to honor and offer our gratitude for those who have been taken away from us too early.

Heaven has another angel. Holding tight onto my memories and letting them guide me through this sadness and realization that life and health are fleeting. ♥

October 2013 Reunion - RIP Rodney ♥

October 2013 Reunion – RIP Rodney ♥


Thank you!

Just finished watching the movie, “Sliding Doors”…movie from 1998, quite a pleasant surprise! ♥ John Hannah…and Gwyneth Paltrow wasn’t too bad either. :-)

James: Cheer up. Remember what the Monty Python boys say.
Helen: “Always look on the bright side of life”?
James: No, “Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition.”


Sweet Dreams – Emily Browning

During my movie marathon weekend, came across this movie, “Sucker Punch”…suspended reality and enjoyed it,,,even though disturbingly sad….

Some of my fav movie lines:
Sweet Pea: Everyone has an Angel. A Guardian who watches over us. We can’t know what form they’ll take. One day, old man. Next day, little girl. But don’t let appearances fool you, they can be as fierce as any dragon. Yet they’re not here to fight our battles, but to whisper from our heart. Reminding that it’s us. Its everyone of us who holds power over the world we create.

Sweet Pea: And finally this question, the mystery of who’s story it will be. Of who draws the curtain. Who is it that chooses our steps in the dance? Who drives us mad? Lashes us with whips and crowns us with victory when we survive the impossible? Who is it, that does all of these things?

Sweet Pea: Who honors those we love for the very life we live? Who sends monsters to kill us, and at the same time sings that we will never die? Who teaches us what’s real and how to laugh at lies? Who decides why we live and what we’ll die to defend? Who chains us? And Who holds the key that can set us free… It’s You. You have all the weapons you need. Now Fight!

Wiseman: If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.

Wiseman: For those who fight for it, life has a flavor the sheltered will never know.

Yes…the sooner you embrace the harsh reality…The less pain you will feel.. ♥


Mundane, Mediocrity then boom… Moonstruck…

Ah definitely a movie marathon this weekend….flipping channels and hit pay dirt! Moonstruck!!! Still one of my all-time favorite romantic comedies!  Some say it’s dated. Yay!  It may definitely show my age. But I love this movie – all the characters are so beautifully flawed.  I cried and felt my heart surge. 

And one of my all-time fav movie lines: 

Ronny Cammareri: “Loretta, I love you. Not like they told you love is, and I didn’t know this either, but love don’t make things nice – it ruins everything. It breaks your heart. It makes things a mess. We aren’t here to make things perfect. The snowflakes are perfect. The stars are perfect. Not us. Not us! We are here to ruin ourselves and to break our hearts and love the wrong people and *die*. The storybooks are *bullshit*. Now I want you to come upstairs with me and *get* in my bed!”

Second:

Ronny Cammareri: I love you.
Loretta Castorini: Snap out of it!

♥♥ ♥♥


Jakob Dylan “You’re No Match”

Still feeling under the weather, so its been a movie marathon weekend already. Came across this little unknown film….not the best, not the worst. It’s a movie for anyone whose life has been thrown off-course, out of whack, or simply not turned out the way they planned it. Heard this song from the movie soundtrack…had to share…♥

I may be down for the count
I may not get up again
Now, you could say I gave out
But that I never gave in…


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